Only Your Real Friends Will Tell You When Your Face Is Dirty

Friendship it sure is a curious thing! Have you ever wondered why or how you became to be friends with the people you are friends with? I have, on many occasions in fact. I've always wondered why we are attracted to the people we are attracted too. Now I guess personality does play a role in it but if you look at some of my friends I did NOT pick them because we are the same person or our personalities work well together. I guess I lot of it is Providential too. Yet, it still intrigues me to think why I like the people that I like. Also why the people who like me, like me! I wish we could trace every moment in our lives and see where we had that thought "oh I like you". To see that action, joke, or phrase that made us fall in love with our best friend? Wouldn't you like to know what it was. Even if it was providential! To see why for that season you became friends with that person. Maybe one day we will see the big picture. I will get to see how I helped others by just being their friend and how others helped and grew me. Like one big movie just watching all the happily ever afters explained!


I love being home and seeing all my friends! It is sooo nice to be around people who know you inside and out. I haven't laughed this hard in ages! I've been goofy, done the most ridiculous stuff, said the most absurd things and the people around me think it is funny!! they haven't given me that stare of disapproval in fact more often than not they have joined in! AHHHH I love these old friendships and it gives me encouragement to go back to knox and make these same kind of friendships with new people! Isn't it fun to watch the Bible come alive! 


Here are some friendship quotes:
~A single rose can be my garden... a single friend, my world


~A loyal friend laughs at your jokes when they're not so good, and sympathizes with your problems when they're not so bad.


~The friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you.


~The most I can do for my friend is simply be his friend


~A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.


~A true friend is one who thinks you are a good egg even if you are half-cracked


~Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving     lie


~Strangers are just friends waiting to happen!


So go out and make a friend today, be a friend to today, and tell a friend you love them today!


-Abs

A laughing Moment!

This is one of my most favorite videos!! I think it is soo funny and cute! I still don't quite understand what the ending really means....but yea hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

The Weather Outside Is..

Hello World!!!
It has been such a long long long time since I wrote to you! My reasoning is that I am home with the people I love and really am writing this blog for so why keep writing they already know what I am doing. But I guess that isn't fair to all of my new friendly readers who don't live in memphrica! I really have not been up to much! I sleep a lot!! I don't really understand why I sleep so much actually...I guess I am making up for what I lost during the school year! I LOVE  being home with my family! It is so much fun to just sit around and hang out with everybody. I taught my little brothers how to play uno and we have had a good ole time with that! they informed me of course that the first time I taught them I didn't get all of the instructions right. Oh well you do what you can right!

I can't believe Christmas is right around the corner! Like legit in four days! It doesn't quite feel like it is Christmas time yet. I love Christmas time though...All the lights and warm fuzzy feelings....Its just like the world gets a little happier when Christmas rolls around. Of course they also get a little crankier, crazier, and  drive insanely but oh well. I think it is really cool to see all the unity at Christmas time. Everyone is listening to the same music, buying presents for loved ones, putting up Christmas decorations! Sure we don't all have the same religion but because of the ONE and only God we are all being united, even though some don't realize it, by His story! Ahhhh I can't wait to sit around our Christmas tree on Christmas eve with only the tree lighting the room and just talk about the greatest story! I love Christmas...and I love being home with my family! I hope everyone else is having a great Christmas holiday!! Go spread some good Christmas cheer!!

"Laugh and the world laughs with you"

HI,
It's been a while! That would be my fault. The past few weeks have been utterly crazy!! Here are a few pictures of what has occurred.

Chi O formal with my dashing date Jake Baker! And before you get any ideas he is JUST a friend! I know sorry to disappoint but we are in no way dating, talking, or talking about dating lol! I went home and that's all I heard was WHO WAS YOUR DATE!? Yes girls I do realize he is attractive but if you think so just come on down, up , or over to UT and have a swing at it! The dance was a lot of fun! Although I must admit I felt a little self conscious about my dancing! It was a live band that played old jazz music. Which I wasn't prepared for at all so I didn't brush up on my ballroom moves :/...But I still had a blast so its all good!

I got to see a lot of my dear friends over Thanksgiving break! It was a lot of fun to see everyone! It was especially nice to get to be around more girls who thought more like I do! It was soo nice to once again bring up conversations about our relationship with God mixed in with all the other catching up. It is sad that I don't do that on a regular basis with anyone but I don't know there is just something different when you can share and talk with others that think like you do.

Thanksgiving was soo much fun! I'm not going to lie I was a little worried that it wasn't going to be the best one and I think it will make to be in the top ten for a while! We had four Korean girls come over so that was interesting. That is what I was worried about. Because ya see they don't speak perfect English yet and I didn't want to have to try and mingle with the language barrier. Really I was just being selfish and didn't want to have to think about anything else besides my family and dear friends. BUT it was soo much fun having them there. Yea the language barrier was kinda hard but it was still cool to interact. It was funny we tried to teach the what air quote "" are! My dad was a pretty good explainer because by the end of the night they got it! One of the girls turned to another and said your "pretty". We all busted out laughing! We all sat at one table for dinner too!! It was soo cool to have 19 people sitting and talking together. My mom did a wonderful job of decorating it looked sooo pretty!! The food was delicous! I really love being around my family! This trip we talked about how crazy our holidays are going to be once we all have kids! It is going to be so AWESOME! Imma plan a huge football tournament and I assure you every espy will be in attendance at every holiday! I can't wait! p.s. the last picture is what happened when I was leaving! ahhh I love my family!

This week is finals!! Which oh my goodness stress me out soo much! but imma doin okay and keeping my cool! Hopefully I'm going to ace them all! I'm a little bit nervous about my grades this semester I don't think they are going to be anything like highschool! So depressing. But you know what I'm going to come back next semester prepared and going to make it just like high school! You know what I think is funny. The thought process that once you get to college you magically mature. I do not think this is the case. I'm still doing stupid high school sometimes even middle school stuff! I mean don't get me wrong I'm being mature when I need to be but I just go crazy sometimes! I wonder if it's always like that. I think it be kinda cool if it stayed like that! I like still being a kid sometimes!

The other day I was thinking about gossip, judging, and stories and it dawned on me... You know when you hear a person tell you a story about how another person wronged them...You just automatically believe the story and you side with the person telling it and your like I am soo sorry. That's not fair. You are hearing a biased story and without even thinking about it you are already judging and making accusations about a person you might not even know. I think this is why the bible says do not judge unless you want to be judged. Cause think about it how many stories have you heard from your best friend and then later in life you hear it from the other person perspective. The two stories are usually very opposite! I feel like many times I have wrongly judged someone because I believed the person telling the story was telling me the whole story. I have also told stories embellished in my favor that have lead people to judge other people on false accusations. It's sad how many people I have automatically written off inside my head from what other people say about them without actually getting to know them myself.  I am sorry to all those people I have believed lies about, judged falsely or torn down their reputation. I am going to try and be careful about what I say about people. I need to remember that there are always at least TWO parts to a story. I think that is why God warns us about judging and gossiping. It is so interesting when you see those bible verses you have had memorized for years take on new meanings and come to life. I love how when I open the bible every time a new story unfolds!

Well if off to study's for me! May a new or old part of Jesus' story unfold to you today!

The Art Of Deception

Deception is something I have never really been able to understand. I cannot, for the life of me, find a reason where deception is necessary. Yet, deceptions seems to be a part of everyday life in our culture. It is everywhere, you see it in all the movies, on tv shows, and in books! At first I thought it was just going to be one of those high school habits that everyone quickly grew out of. I was wrong. It is almost as if high school was training camp. The place you learned different tactics on how to deceive those around you. Personally I dislike being deceitful with an extreme passion. I believe in being honest with everyone and don't think it is right to say one thing to someone's face and then to turn around and say the complete opposite a second later. I also do not think deceit is biblical in anyway. I will always tell someone to their face what I would ever tell any other person. I hate being fake with people honestly if I do not like you I am not going to pretend we are best friends. I will be nice and polite to you but I will not lie and suck up to you just so that you will like me. I am sorry if this is crude and frowned upon by our society but where does it say that I must be best friends with everyone on the planet? Yes I am called to love everyone but I this does not mean I tell acquaintances that I love their boots when I think they are the uglies things i've ever seen. NO!! that is lying and I do not know why our culture has accepted these actions to be okay. Why are there people who are supposedly "best friends" but when one of them isn't there all they do is rag on the other person and say awful things about them? Is it because we are so caught up on everyone wanting to like us? I think this is more of a problem among girls but I don't thing guys are excused. It is just so strange and sad to me that people will do this to one another. I've seen so many friendships ripped apart and people get hurt when they didn't need to be.

I think the root problem is gossip. Our culture thrives on gossip. I, myself included. I love to hear the latest story. Half the time I don't think I even realize that I am gossiping. This is so sad because the bible obviously describes gossiping and the hurtfulness and wrongness of it. I think if as girls we started to guard out tongues better and actually thought about what qualifies as gossip our relationships would be much better. It worries me sometimes though...the thought what would we talk about always come to my mind. which is so sad because I should be able to carry on conversations without having to participate in gossip. I wish I was better at holding my tongue and not spreading gossip or digging for gossip. I really am going to try and be better because it would make things so much better if I did. Just think if we didn't gossip how confidential anything you said to anyone would be. How nice would it be to know that what you said isn't about to spread like wild fire! Ah to be that girl that people know they can trust to talk to. I want to be that girl. Lord, help me to be a confidential girl who holds her tongue and does not hide who she is from other people. May I never intentionally deceive anyone and may my motives always be pure. Let's do it girls. Let's try and stop spreading the fire of gossip and promote confidentiality!

Happiness

HI! 
Long time no see!!
I don't have much time to let you in on life but here are a few happy quote i found.
Today has been a rough day of life and it's beautiful complications and these were good reminders!
I hope you enjoy them as much as I do. 

• Make one person happy each day and in forty years you will have made 14,600 human beings happy for a little time at least.

• The secret of happiness is not in doing what one likes to do but in liking what one has to do. 

• Looking forward to things is half the pleasure of them.

• Even if happiness forgets you a little bit, never completely forget
       about it.

• Happy people roll with the punches.  They know from experience that
       everything changes.  Today's good fortune may vanish tomorrow,
       today's crises may turn out to be tomorrow's good fortune.

• Everyone is responsible for their own joy.

• Happiness is not a state to arrive at, but a manner of traveling

• What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity.  They are trifles,
      to be sure, but scattered along life's pathway, the good they do is
      inconceivable.

• Joyfulness keeps the heart and face young.  A good laugh
         makes better friends with ourselves and everybody around.

•      I'm going to be happy today, Though the skies may be cloudy and gray  No matter what may come my way I'm going to be happy today.

• The joyful people are those who are generous and kind 
  The miserable people are those who are selfish & unforgiving.
  The problem solvers are those whose lives are powered by  faith & optimism.
  The problem people are those whose lives are drained by  doubts & pessimism.
  The winners are those who learn to take full responsibility for their actions.
  The losers are those who blame others for their failures.

• Happiness is like a potato salad  -  when shared with others - 
  it's a picnic.

• Nothing has to happen for me to feel good!  I feel good because
          I'm alive!  Life is a gift, and I revel in it.

• Where ever you are going, whatever the weather always bring your own sunshine.

• This is the day the Lord has Made I will Rejoice and be Glad in IT!!!

Quotes always fascinate me. I love to sort through a pile of them and find those couple that are just awesome! I could just curl up with a fluffy blanket and shift through quotes all day long and be entertained the whole time. So let's go be happy!

Life

I don't want to start this week.
I really just want to curl up in a big bed with fluffy pillows and comforters and forget the world.
I'm not sure why I want this. It's a weird feeling that this week is just going to be full of life.
The depressing reality that we live in, because of or fallen nature.
I just have a feeling that there will be more messy-ness this upcoming week.
and I just don't want to deal with it.
I want to curl up with a romantic book and imagine that is how the world is.
To do nothing for days!!
But it is time i brace for the week coming. That I put on my armor and show this world that this isn't the end.
that this isn't the reality we have to live in.
There is more to come.
There is a place that is much more than we could ever imagine.
A place where feelings are never hurt.
Boys are never jerks.
Friends never lie.
People aren't starving.
Children aren't crying.
Wars aren't being fought.
Just a place of peace and rest.
A place where we can look on the face of the Almighty and just bask in His Glory.
So for this week I take on the challenge to show the people around me a piece of that peace.
A glimpse of that happiness
A sliver of that honesty
An embrace of that comfort
because it doesn't take a multitude just a smile and a good attitude.
So let's go attack this week and make a mark for the kingdom to come!

Halloweeeen!!

Well I bought a Mac and can't figure out how to download my pictures soo I can't put any of my own pictures on here or on facebook! Depressing I know but I will learn soon hopefully! What shall I update you all on! Well I am secretary of Freshman Council..which I apparently won by quite a bit...It was most likely the candy I used to bribe everyone to vote for me but hey it worked didn't it! The position is a lot of fun! I get to sit up front, take roll, type the minutes as they happen (which gets kinda hectic sometimes), send emails, update the facebook group, and anything else secretarial!! It is nice being in a leadership position that helps all the other positions out. It is really humbling and is already teaching me that it is never all about myself! I love it! Second on thursday I found out that in my math class a 77 is a B and a 87 is an A!!! Isn't that awesome soo that grade I was upset about being a C is really a B! And then he added 9 extra points to it so now it is one point away from being an A!! It was a very exciting day when that happened! In class my pretty skinny teacher told us he lost 200+ pounds on the atkins diet! We all just starred at him in disbelief! It made me feel like a loser cause all I wanna do is lose like 10 pounds and he lost 200!! like WHAT! I went to Reese's haunted house the other night! It was actually pretty good! I think the best part was going with other girls who were screaming their heads off! I was right there with them sometimes..but ahh it was soo funny! The whole act is set up in the basement of reese, an all boys dorm identical to humes,  and they have black tarps making a maze throughout the whole thing! I went with Freshman council people! I am really making the best friends from freshman council! Legit I love all the people I have met! they are all overachievers, polite, fun people! I love it!!

Last night I went to an RUF halloween dance party! I dressed up as belle! I know such a little 5 yr old costume but see I found the perfect belle dress at good will and couldn't let the time pass me by! But I didn't actually stay at the party long so the costume didn't even really get seen! :(....It was really awkward. See I slightly got ditched and had to walk on over by myself but I ran into some friends who didnt actually let me walk there by myself but when I got there i didn't have a fun group who would be nice to me and you know how awkward it is to be at a dance party without your posse! So I left and walked home by myself pretty soon after I got there. BUT its okay cause I got to go hang out with some awesome people and watch White Chicks for the first time! It was pretty funny. I just find it weird and depressing that churches are the places that are most clique sometimes. I wish it wasn't that way and I am really trying to make sure I don't do that to new people at my church. Churches should be the most loving places I think. But that's my little rant on that!

Im missing the family! I'm thinking about going down to see them nov 6. maybe...but they are coming the next weekend or so and I don't have a ride home yet so who knows what will happen. I am soo excited they are ALL going to be coming to see me!! ahhh I can't wait to just hang out with them all day long and night and ahhhh! I love my family! Aidan is getting so big it seems now that I am far away from him! He told me he missed me on the phone the other day it was soooo cute! Oh I can't remember if I already typed this but my mommy sent me a popcorn tin for halloween! I'm actually munching on some right now! Its buffalo popcorn the best I think!! For the rest of today I am going to be doing homework, some laundry, and maybe hanging out with some peeps later!! So off I go to attack this loverly saturday!

God is good!!,
Abby

Oh the weather!

THE Weather is crazy in tennessee! Seriously, crazy! Today I was not going to be cold on my walk to jhb! I put on sweatpants, uggs, long socks, a warm tshirt, and a sweat shirt! I was soo happy today was going to be the day I would be freezing! I go to walk out the door taking those last steps in the warmth gearing up to embrace the cold. You know that feeling we all do it when we walk out of church or out of the mall..its almost like you hold your breath hoping it wont be as bad as you think and its always worse. Well anyways, I step out the door and BAM im hit in the face with HEAT!! Like full out hott sticky air....I was shocked..the one day I am prepared not to be cold im going to be burning up!!! So my new best friend is the weather channel in the morning! It was quite a humorous beginning to a long tuesday! Today was a good day. I had a biology exam which I think i actually might have done okay on but that most likely means I did not do good at all. For example got my math test back today and I was pretty positive I had only missed 2 problems so yea an a in the bag! Nope to my surprise I made a c...Im kinda upset about it but he is adding 7 extra bonus points so that will bump it up to a b! So who knows how that exam will turn out. My wonderful mommy and daddy sent me a popcorn tin full of loverly goods from the popcorn factory!! I love packages they are my favorite! It kinda makes up for the fact that I don't get gondolas that grandma brought them today! It is weird not getting to see my grandparents because im not there. I hope the rest of the family has fun with them this week! I'm beginning to miss my family again! It doesn't take me long..cause pretty much my family is the greatest!! Just you wait espy's we gonna have the best christmas' and other holidays!! I love you all! My dearest old friend and pretty much little sister Bekah Baggett came and saw me today! It was really fun getting to talk to her and show her around UT! I think she rather enjoyed it, especially 3 spoons! but then who couldn't love 3 spoons! Ruf was cancelled tonight due to the storms going on. There is a tornado warning...which I wasn't sure where we would go if we had a tornado so I texted my RA. Turns out my RA doesn't know either, so hope nothing happens. I think the worst is over and nothing happened so its all good!

Chi O just finished lip sync! How exhausting it was! It was a lot of fun it just took so much of my sleeping time! We got 5th place which is okay for being out of 13 but it is depressing that we didn't place or anything. O well we tried our best. We had Prince: here are some loverly pictures!

The whole group!

Roomie!

I feel so accomplished and blogger suave now that I have finally put some pictures on!

Well that is what is new in my life! thanks for reading

xoxo

.......a...k....e......

Sleep deprivation is not fun at all! I legit have a headache from lack of sleep! What happen to the stereotype that college will be the best four years of your life? That you won't have to go to class? That all you will do is have tons of free time? NO!! I study study study all the time! I go to class I do homework..I work in Freshman Council and Chi O and church...besides that I am in my room or the library! I can't wait till I don't have to study anymore. To be at that point in my life where all I do is live my life! But I will enjoy these four years I will just be very tired on breaks!

Side note I really really want to go to puppy zone! I keep seeing people's pictures it looks sooo cute!!
Okay back to writing my paper!
Oh I don't know if I told you but I made Secretary of Freshman Council!!!! Yea more leadership!!!


xoxo

Hi stress Hi stress it's off to the Library I go!

I AM SOOO STRESSED OUT!!!!!!

I know what you are thinking..."abby if you are stressed why are you writing a blog...?" Well electronic viewers let me tell you....writing helps me get it all out and then I can go back to working! Right now I am sitting in the library trying to continue the mountain of homework I have!! I just finished lip sync!! yea last time I will ever have to go to one of those practices!! It also means I get my life back so I can do school work. I know such a party college kid I am! I'm really resisting tell facebook that whoever brought me icecream to the 6th floor of the library would be my best friend via my status...So far I am succeeding but I really want some extra chocolate with some type of chunks in it, sprinkles, and a waffle cone! OOOO how that would just make my day! Alas i will sit here and imagine it and go to bed hungry lol! As you can tell I have some homework to do but it is okay cause it isn't too too bad. I just have to write a spanish paper, english paper, revise a science paper, make the science powerpoint, study for math test, and study for biology test.....but I can do it!

   I have been learning a lot this week! I realized recently that in some relationships of mine I've have been looking at them with conditions. I don't want to give my all and be that super nice person I know I would want if I know I that person isn't going to return the same in the end. HOW AWFUL!! Here I am a Christian who has been given the greatest gift ever and I can't manage to show a little bit of that love while I'm on earth! I am reminded of this constantly. I think it is one of the lessons God is really trying to show me. I am not suppose to love someone if they will love me back. That isn't love. Love isn't something you can turn on when someone is acting just the way you want them too. Love is loving them through their flaws. Looking at the hurt they cause you and trying to find God in that person still. We all mess up and we will all disappoint and hurt people and I would want that person to still love me. Therefore I must first love them. If they love me back thats awesome, if they don't that's awesome. Sure I will be hurt but that is my only job on earth. To love God first above all then to love the people HE puts in my life. So I'm trying! Feel free to help me out and send me messages of ways I could be loving or where I am being hurtful. I started the 365 love dare challenge book....I know silly right it's for married people. But see this is what I thought...I need to love God like I am married to him and I aslo need to love the people in my life. Finally I thought it might help me and my room mate! We are kinda in a marriage. So I started and it is amazing how much God shows you when you focus on one verse for a day or one specific day. Like today I was suppose to ask God to show me how to love people in a better way. It was like every corner I recognized a place I wasn't being loving or something would happen and I would want to react harshly...and there in the back of my head was that prayer. It was really refreshing!

     I recently had this thought... I want to be soo in love with God that a boy has to pretty much knock down a building to sweep me off my feet. I don't want to be so worried about finding that right person. (Not that I am) but there is always that nagging of the world that is like "what you don't have a boyfriend, you haven't been on dates in weeks, what is wrong with you"...It is soo annoying! So I really really want to be so focused, in love, and satisfied with God that a boy has to do something big to get my attention. I know I will never be who I am meant to be if I do not fully love God with all my mind, heart, soul, and strength. So here I go trying to love God more One day at a time!!

Home again Home again jig-i-d-jog!

It is FALL BREAK!!! I love being home! I have spent my whole time completely with the family and it has been utterly wonderful! On Thursday I went with my mommy and Emma and we all got our haircut! Then we took my youngest little sister who is rapidly growing up to get here ears pierced. She looks like a new person she has a new haircut and new earrings and she got her first pair of big girl jean sizes. Of course they are 00 that little tiny rascal! Then we met the rest of the family at Ocharleys! I had missed O'charleys a lot lol. Which yes I know is silly cause we have them in Knoxville but it was really good! Aidan, mom, and I went to Kroger to get some groceries for the weekend! Aidan gave me the pleasure of pushing him around in one of those car carts! It was soo funny I let him do all the driving and hopefully taught him the difference from his left and right. We had to stop twice for gas and bought the most random goodies! I got to stop by the football game and see some of my favorite sophomores, juniors, and seniors! I also ran into my long lost friend Hannah Moore! so we got to catch up after such a long time apart! It was soo nice to just sit and talk with an old friend! I loved loved it! Then I stayed up into the hours of the  wee morning with Lizzie! We have been watching gossip girl thanks to my  loverly friend Allison grant who let me borrow the whole 2nd season :D! Then Thursday we got up and the girls crashed moms and the boys field trip to paint a piece! They all painted mugs except for Aidan who painted a horse! They are all wonderful artists and it makes me wonder why I didn't get a little bit of those genes!! It is not fair lol! Then we came home and all hung out and made dinner. Then it was a big ole family dinner with steaks, pink stuff, rolls, broccoli and cheese, potatoes, and a delicious 5 layer pumpkin cake! It was a delicious dinner! Friday was the 22nd anniversary of the best parents in the world! they are so cute! So dad bought wii fit for their anniversary lol. We spent the whole evening all playing the games. It was soo much fun! The grandparents stopped by and it was nice to see them and spend the rest of the evening just chatting and laughing at the wii characters as we hit them with snowballs. I love being home! I am not sure I am going to be able to go back to Knoxville. I have actually been able to feel like this is the everyday norm. I like it. Sunday can take as long as possible to get here. especially since next week is going to be awfully busy! I brought some homework home that I needed to do but honestly i haven't touched it and not sure if I will....Next week we are going to have lip sync practice like no other! It is going to be exhausting especially since i am not a dancer at all and suck at it! I have also eaten soo much this weekend im going back gaining my freshman 15! But it has been good I will make up for it next week! I will hopefully see Tori and Helen tonight! :). how i miss those two! Now I shall return to chilling with my favorite family!


hasta la vista!

"There are no strangers, there are no outcasts, there are no orphans of God."

This is a song I heard on sunday and it really touched my heart! What a blessing it is to know that no matter what how desolate or alone we feel on this earth we NEVER truly are. They are lies fed to us from the devil to keep us from living the life God created us to live. No matter how abandoned I feel by friends I know I have a much greater friend who loves me stronger than a brother. His name is Jesus. Yet, I think the easiest and most effective way to show the lost the awesomeness of God is through love. Simply actions is my motto. Like it says below my title of the blog "it doesn't take a multitude just a smile and a good attitude." i wrote that phrase when writing a poem about calling people to take action and help those in need. It simply means to me that you don't have to be part of a huge organization or get 100 people to join with you in a movement to touch the world. It begins with those little acts of kindness. The letter to an old friend, some cookies for your neighbors, a lunch date with your bestie, a smile at a stranger. We never know how much of an implication our actions make on people. This unfortunately goes both ways and most of the time our hurtful rash actions make a longer lasting impression than the many little kind things we do each day. Yet, the small actions are what can brighten somebodies day. I know this is true for me. Even as a Christian I long for people to show me the love of Christ. I need it almost as much as non believers do, except that I realize where this desire comes from. Another song says "love with His hands, see with His eyes". We are the body of Christ and I need to realize what His hands should be doing and do it. For the world will know us by our love. Little things impact people in a huge way. For me I delight in the little things and I also get torn up over little things. Sometimes I find it is easy for me to forgive big mistakes but I find myself getting caught up on little stabs. I guess cause bigger things seem more put on to me and its the little things that show your daily heart and thoughts. I feel like big mistakes can be easily made while those little daily things are the ones you think about and reflects how you truly feel. I hadn't realized till college how much mean words can actually hurt. Just the simple middle school name calling names. You know the ones that are so common that many times we throw them up as a joke. Especially on the college campus everyone calls one another crude words and doesn't mean a thing by them. So it is easy for one to forget how awful they really are. Personally I was falling into this same though process just throwing sarcastic names around. Sure I thought I meant them until one day. On this day I realized how hurtful words really can be. I am from this day going to try and watch what I say about people and what names I call them because I never know if im hanging a new article in their thought closet that will haunt them or tear them apart. So i urge you to rethink about what you call people. Think about how you interact with people are you edifying them as Christ would want you to? I know it is a struggle especially as a girl I have a hard time not gossiping and saying things that only lift a person up. James 5:9 says "Don't grumble against each other, brothers, or you will be judged." Im not sure how I got on this spill but I did. I guess living with people reteaches you the basic things you knew in a whole new light.

Random thought of the day: I have never quite seen the point of leaf plowers. Seriously they just move the leaves or mulch or whatever from the road to the grass. Just from one spot to the next. I can understand like after you mow or something but seriously sometimes I see these guys just blowing a pile of rubble to another side of the yard. I also never got the point of raking. I understand that yes to many leaves does get obnoxious but I personally think leaves on the ground look pretty. They are also re-fertilizing the ground right? so why not just leave them there. Why do our yards have to be spotless? its nature...Yet I don't like it when the yard is covered in leaves I can understand it then lol.
I love the crunchy sound leaves make under your feet!

That is all for today,
xoxo

Winter skipped falls spot in the line of seasons.

It is freezing cold here in loverly knoxvegas! I believe this morning it was 44 degrees! I was blocking my vision by just breathing!! I am not prepared for it to be this cold so soon! I'm pretty sure it didn't get this cold last year till like december! I need to go home this week and buy sweaters, sweaters, sweaters, and some more boots lol. College is expensive it is not fun! I feel like I am constantly needing new clothes. That is a definite advantage of wearing uniforms everyday yet makes for a disadvantage when you go to college...then you are behind!

I went to severe heights baptist church this sunday! I'm pretty sure I could hear my mom jumping on the other side of the phone when I told her I was going to a baptist church! I love her! It was really nice, I'm pretty sure the music leader use to be at bellevue. It has been really strange both of the churches that lean more towards baptist views and what I am raised with have hit on missions and spurred that passion in my heart. Not that the other churches didn't have good messages that hit home. But it makes me stop to wonder if that is just coincidence that these two churches have pegged my heart on the first sermon. This sermon was about missions and specifically about an orphanage in haiti! ahh I about died. I just wanted to be there holding some of those little kids. They were soo cute in their pictures!

This whole weekend all I've been thinking about and praying is for everyone back home at memphis. I wish so badly I could be there to share my sorrow and comfort to the families. But I know they have plenty of friends and family that are showering them with the love of God. It's a sad and tragic situation but we know that God has a plan for everything and we know that luke is in a much better place. I rejoice and am envious of the place he gets to be, complete union with the God Almighty. but I grieve for his loved ones that mourn his loss today. May God give them the grace they need in this hard time!

The flower fadeth

I have so many thoughts swarming in my head. Thoughts of sorrow, pain, joy, confusion, uncertainty, gratefulness, compassion, comfort...the list goes on. As Christians how to we attempt to explain events like the one that passes this last week to the world around us? How can we display that we rejoice that Luke is in heaven yet mourn and weep for our loss. A teacher at ECS use to say death is the only certainty in life. It is the only thing we can be sure will happen and that it so unnatural to us because we are meant for eternity. How true that is! Not one of us is guaranteed tomorrow or even the next hour! Which challenges me how would I live each day if I knew it was my last day? what would happen if I veiwed everyday that I woke up like it was my last day. If I tried to grasp every moment I could. If I stopped to help the broken or just lagged a second to hold the door a little longer. If I didn't look for a fight but tried my hardest to keep the peace. What would happen if I actually took my day to heart..but not just for one day but for every day of each year I am granted on this earth.


Yesterday I went hiking with the freshman RUF girls. It was absolutely gorgeous. On the way up we were discussing the tragic events of last years accident with Meredith. A girl in our car had actually been the one who witnessed and reported the accident. We then went to discuss with two sophomore girls how hard and weird it must have been to not be in Memphis when an event like that occurred. I find it ironic that we were discussing this being completely oblivious to the events that happened just the night before. We returned down the mountain and my phone was exploding with text messages about the event. I remember just starring at my phone not believing it to be true. Then there was the confusing rumors and deciphering through the texts to find the true story. It still doesn't feel real as if it is all a dream. I can not begin to imagine how the pruetts must feel and many others who have lost a child, a brother, a friend. I keep them all in my prayers. I can't help but wonder if God is trying to tell us something and if He is what is it. For two events to happen in a year like this to the same grade seems so strange to me. My heart grieves for the grade of 2013. They have been hit with the hard struggles of life. Yet, it is such an encouragement to see how the ECS community comes together. How within 24 hours of the event there is already a prayer and worship service for the tragic event. I pray that this can be a witness to the surrounding memphis communities! May we all keep the families in our prayers! I know God has a plan in all of this and His glory will be ultimately exalted. You will be missed Luke Pruett but we know that you are dancing on the streets of heaven and we will one day see you again. May we all stand strong in the promises God has given us. 

Grace for the moment

"God is God. He knows what he is doing. When you can't trace his hand, trust his heart." This is what I read Monday morning as I was preparing for they day. It made me stop and just mutter the last sentence over and over. God has a plan for my life. Every thing happens for a reason. I feel like those are two statements Christians use all the time but are the first things we forget. I forget them all the time. Not that I forget the sayings, no in fact I find myself repeating them to friends when they are in times of trouble. Yet, I don't find myself repeating them to myself in those little times of trouble. On those days when everything stinks and door seem to be slamming in my face. I don't think hey every thing happens for a reason. Instead I become cynical and begin to think like the world and say those events only happen by coincidence. I don't always remember to stop, wait and look to learn what i am missing. I just blow through the moments with a bad attitude and a "woe is me" mentality. I need to learn to trust His heart. I think more than anything I need to learn his heart. I want to know his heart like it is the back of my hand. I don't want to have to search for his heart, I want to be so familiar with His ways that it pops out from the page! I want everything else to become black and white as his grace and will shoots from life in streaming colors!  I lose the big picture a lot!!! I get bogged down in the here and now and worry waaaay to much! God has a plan more is yet to come. I need to stop be still and know that HE is God!

This week is Big sister week in the Chi O suite!! It is soooo amazing! I have way to much stuff! There is candy in the room! ALL over the room! It is not good at all cause it is all that i eat! Seriously this mornings breakfast consisted of chocolate! Oh college diets! I have owls everywhere! I have 15 new tshirts so far!! I don't know who my big is but I already love her! She has gone above and beyond my expectations! It is AMAZING how much stuff I have! It surprises me everytime I walk in to pick up my new stuff for the day. I keep thinking the amount of stuff will decrease but I think it increases! We have four days of presents! The first was candy, cookies, and baked goods for C. The second day was hand me down day for H. The third day was insomnia for I. Finally the fourth day is outburst for O. What does that spell? CHI O!!! hahah its been a lot of fun! My big is amazing... To amazing! I really don't know what to do with everything it is crazy! My room is such a mess because of it too!

I have definitely underestimated the amount of studying college classes would require! I knew college would be hard but I didn't really realize how much studying and notes I would have to take on my own! Like for my Biology class I have to read each chapter before class taking my own notes, then take notes in class, then combine the notes, then go to the Professors private open discussion groups, then to his teachers assistant help groups. IT IS CRAZY! but that is only for biology. I feel like the class is 3 classes it takes soo much time! I just never realized how much teaching myself I would be doing in college. The teachers no longer give you the answers you have to find them out on your own for sure! Which I am not complaining about I just completely underestimated what I would have to do. So now I started off a little rough but that is to be expected and I know I will be doing better as the years go on!

Well it is back to studying and doing homework!
xoxo

Sisters, there where never such devoted sisters!

Lizzie came to knoxvegas this weekend and she brought allie and kate along with her! It was a whole lot of fun! We really just goofed off together and talked and ate a lot of food! It was nice to just hang out with my sister. As she described all we have to do is sit in each others presence and we can feel our energy playing off of one another! There is nothing quite like sister bonds! But alas the weekend is over and I must now buckle down and do the dreaded homework! I'm trying to train myself to not think of it as dreaded but rather something fun. So far I haven't accomplished that! The game wasn't much fun this week. We barely won which was just not cool and not many people came out to the game so it was kinda awkward! But I hope my junior friends got to see what knoxville is like and hopefully I will get to see them on campus again one day! Tomorrow starts Big sis little sis week!! I am sooooo excited!! We have four days of presents! Apparently they give us soo much stuff it is unbelievable! I am super curious as to who my big sis is! I can not wait to find out! So this week will most likely be a long one since I will be anxiously waiting to find out who she is till next sunday! Ahhh I've always wanted a big sister as cheesy as that sounds!  It is weird  writing so close to my last post I don't have a novel to report about like all the other times! It is getting cooler here! I got to have the coolest conversation the other day with a friend about missions! I was pleasantly surprised cause I don't usually run into people who want to do missions that are completely normal lol. But it was the fastest most peaceful two hours of my day lol! Three spoons is a frozen yogurt restaurant we have right here near campus that is delicious!!! It is where I will gain my freshman 15 lol! I really do need to make myself get on a no sugar diet though! The desserts in the cafeteria are killing me!! They are sooo good and there are soo many of them!

Recently, I have been thinking about missions. I don't really like the connotation we give its name. I feel like when people now a day think about missions they think of people who go over seas and to be a missionary you have to give up your life for something worse or less than what you could be. I feel like the mission is like this goal that they have to accomplish as a missionary. Like when we go on mission trips we have a set goal and if we don't meet it the trip wasn't worth it. When in reality I think everyone is a missionary. Missions should be our daily focus. We shouldn't treat it like a job, it is a lifestyle. It should be how we live not something we have to meetings and trips for. The trips are a great tool! but they are not where the work stops. Missionaries should not be that different from every single on of us. The only difference I feel should be that they live in a different country, at least some of them. I feel like people look down or up to missions. They look down upon it in that they think that you have to sacrifice yourself and your potential to be a missionary. Which yes you do have to sacrifice but not anything about who you are. Just maybe some American comforts. I know everyone is different and everyone is called to various places and occupations in life but being a missionary isn't sacrificing a good life. To me it is life. To go and serve people 24/7 in a different country where they have less than I do is life to me. That is where I find my most joy is in serving people! But then there are the places where missionaries are elevated and praised because they are special people who are called to give up that much of their lives. Yes they have a special calling but I believe we are all called to missions. I don't think its right to praise missionaries more than others, they are the same people as you and me they just go different places. Yes, it makes it a little easier to see their dedication but that doesn't meant they are doing bigger and better things than someone ministering to the neighbors. These are just some of my thoughts on missions. I fully accept that some of them may be wrong and I am sorry if I ever offend anyone with what I say. Hopefully going overseas one day is a passion of my heart! I anxiously await the day when i am able to go over seas. but I know I have a place here and now I must be ministering to. So i will anxiously await what God has in store for me to do today! I hope you all have a wonderful sunday! Drive back safely little sister!
To God be the glory!

ooooo college life....

Hi! I think it has already been longer since the last time I wrote and I said I was going to do better! Oh well. So I told you I was going to write about pledge retreat so I will! It was a lot of fun yet completely exhausting! Because we stayed up ALL night...I don't really like all nighters especially after a long week of school! But it was a lot of fun! We did a lot of ice breakers, ate a lot of junk food, had some funny skits, got visited by some loverly older sisters, learned some history of our sorority, laughed, cried, had secret gifts for our secret hootie pal, and shared a lot about ourselves. It was really just a weekend or really a night of getting to know all the girls in our pledge class and create one big new family lol! Chi O has been a really blessing to me these past few weeks. It has given me the opportunity to meet soo many good girls and to have a huge group of friends. It is really like having a family because to some certain extent all the girls have to like you like you have to love your own family. I'm sure they dont HAVE to love you like your family does but to a certain extent they do! It is awesome! A real comfort fall back to know hey these people like me! Also I like them and I really do feel at home with them!

Okay now some football games! Well the first football I went to was against Oregon. I spent the whole day tailgating with some Chi O's. It was suppose to rain so I was prepared and had been carrying my rain jacket around with me ALL day and it was sunny as could be! So i was getting really annoyed having to carry it around everywhere and not even needing it. My feet also hurt from the shoes I was wearing! So i went back to my dorm to grab some water and put on some more comfortable shoes. And of course I put my rain jacket down! Then I headed to the game! At the game I sat with my friend Brooke Fraser and her date for Chi o and some of her other friends! The game started off really well we were playing pretty good at least for the beginning lol. And then all the sudden the game came to a pause because they saw lightening and we were going to have to wait it out. Then the sky turned the scariest color ever!! It was actually very creepy. We stayed and tried to sit and wait it out and I was just thinking how ironic it was that once i laid my rain jacket down it would rain! So of course it MONSOONS!!! I was soaked! It was cute some of Brooke's friends tried to shield the rain from us it somewhat worked but after a while we ran up to take cover from the rain! Then finally after like an hour the game starts again! Then we stay till about half time when I finally leave because I felt completely awful! I think from the rain and being exhausted! The second game I went to was against FLORIDA!!! It was a good game we lost of course! We always lose lol. Its really depressing though because they kinda make it like a tease they do okay and you think we somewhat have a chance and then they lose it! That game was fun except that it was at 3 in the afternoon so it was burning up! The student section is in the sun so I got a pretty nice tan! But on the other hand I don't think I have ever sweated that much before in such a short amount of time!

Last week we had PEACE, LOVE, & CHI O!!! It was soo soo much fun!! I went with Paul Michael Peeler who is a guy I kinda knew from highschool. I had asked Sarah Beasley to find me a date lol...I just felt really weird asking a guy and I dont know many of them so she said she knew some good Christian guys she could set me up with! And it ended up being Paul Michael! AHH i dont think I will ever go to a mixer ever again! Everyone always says date parties are more fun than mixers but I couldn't really understand why until I went! It is SO much better going with a date. One because we actually knew we were surrounded by good guys and two because you are actually with someone i guess! Our theme is hippy 70's is theme! it was soo much fun and such a cute them to dress up as! Now for Chi O we are doing this thing called lip sync. Its a competition between all the new pledges of each sorority and we get a them and we have to make up a dance and lip sync to the songs and we compete to be the best! Our them is Prince and we start practices on sunday and practice three days a week for 2 hours! Its going to be very tiring but a lot of fun! Of course I am not going to look good because I can not dance to save my life, but I will have fun attempting!

School is getting a whole lot busier! I feel like I just finished a week of sprint studying! Seriously all I did last week was sleep and study sleep and study! Ugh...but this is college and thats really all I need to do lol! I keep freaking out about getting a job though. I really REALLY need one of those. Of course my class schedule right now doesn't really allow for one. I just feel weird not working and I don't like not having income consistently coming in.. it is really not cool. Im kinda worried how I am going to manage having a job, Chi o, Freshman council, and school next semester....I wish everything could be free!! life would be soo much easier...Just kidding.

OH! I made Freshman Council!! Which is the freshman legislature of the Student government association! 300 plus applied and went through two rounds of interviews and 20 girls and 20 guys were chosen to be on the council! AND I MADE IT!!! I was soo excited! At first I went in really blind sided and not knowing what it was all about (to be completely honest I keep finding new details to what we actually do! and am still not sure what it is 100% about) I was just told I would enjoy it and should look in to it. I also thought the whole process was pretty much going to be a sign up and you make it kind of process. I did foresee that there would be 300 people competing!! So when I finally realized I actually really wanted it I was like oh no I haven't been pushing my best qualities enough and really didn't think I would make it to round 2. BUT I did make it to round two!! And round two interviews were going AMAZING! seriously one of my best interviews for anything. I wasn't awkward I had answers flowing and they were good answers. And the atmosphere was really good in the room. I liked the execs interviewing me and I felt like they liked me. I think it was one of the few interviews where I wasn't awkward, I was nice and bubbly like I am around people I know really well. Anyways we all get up to leave and well it was really awkward cause Im the interviewee and I don't know if I should make my way to the door first or if I should wait. So we have that loverly awkward few moments and then we make our way to the door. Well this one guy was standing there with his hand outstretched like you would if you were about to give someone a side hug. So I assumed he was wanted to give me a side hug...So I GAVE HIM A HUG! THEN I realize he was just standing like that to hold the door once I opened it!!! He of course played it off real well and was like "aww how cute! look how sweet she is, we have a connection right from the start". I walked out of the room turned the corner and kicked myself! I was soo embarrassed. I couldn't believe I thought he wanted a hug! How weird is that! So God was giving me some humble pie and for the rest of the day I was sure I was not going to make it because of that! But alas the president called me that night to tell me I had made it....and I screamed on the phone....at the president....then later that night I yelled at a girl "caroline is that you, you look soo cute, I didn't recognize you at all" to which the girl replied "what? Im not caroline" so of course I didn't recognize her cause it wasnt the girl I thought it was.....It was quite an amusing night and day for me lol! But I love freshman council! We had our initiation welcome on tuesday night! I met a lot of fun people who I can not wait to become friends with! I went in thinking I didn't know anyone else doing SGA and actually knew 2 girls. Also there was a guy who is from memphis went to collierville, who went to a dance with one of my friends so we ate at the same house together. and then there was a girl from memphis who was on my bridge builders team from junior camp! So once again it is a small world after all!

Still trying out different churches. Went once again to Fellowship last sunday. They had a baby dedication. So they have 2 marks towards the baptist theology lol. I found out this past sunday that it is a nondenominational church. But I like the sermon series the pastor is preaching on. He is a good preacher!

I really miss little kids. Yesterday on campus I saw two little newborns and wanted SO badly to walk up and ask if I could hold their child for them....I of course did not do this cause that would be creepy! I definitely want to work in that infant rooms at bellevue when I go back for Christmas break!

wow this post is quite long...I have actually been periodically working on it for two days just because I have been that busy! will hopefully update you more periodically!

Far to long my friend!

It has indeed been far to LONG my friend! It's strange how comforting a blog can be. It's as great as a journal yet one step better because I know my closest friends are reading it and now know the crazy thoughts that go through my head and still haven't left my side! Or maybe they have and that's why I have started to feel the distance lol just kidding! Well at the moment I am writing a paper for english but my computer has frozen ONLY on my word document! It is like my computer KNEW I needed to take a break and update people on my life! I have soo many posts I've been waiting to post on here but literally I have had no time whatsoever to post on my loverly blog! So instead of posting a SUPER long one I am going to post a lot of littler ones but they might be posted on the same day. So don't judge or get weirded out there is just so much I need to say and I didn't want to bore you with a really long post. Personally I would rather read 20 short ones than one really really long one. Not sure why but I guess the length scares me and the fact that there isn't much spacing. I'm weird with my reading, for example in writing I know must use blue, purple, or a bright colored pen because when I study I focus better with them and can't focus on the words when they are boring ole black color! My paper is still frozen...this is beginning to make me nervous because if I lose that paper well I will not be happy at all! Hah I just took a screen shot of the paper incase i loose that last paragraph I can go back and read it. I'm a clever one!

Anyways! my other blogs will include: The amazing notes from ruf last tuesday, pledge retreat, the rain drenched football game and the uber amount of homework I have this week.
This blog will be about today! Starting with the easy one first! only because I don't have my ruf notes here in the study room with me!

Today I went to Fellowship. I really am not sure what denomination the church is. It could be non-denominational or presbyterian, :/? It was really nice, getting back to the side that I am use to. It was a newer building more modern looking. Which I think I actually like the older style buildings better. But never judge a church by it's cover :)! It was more modern and upbeat. I didn't know any of the songs except for one hymn that we sang. The message was really good. The pastor is starting a series called "making room for one more" It's about looking more like Christ and reaching out to our (I guess their) community but not through the religious unemotional methods but from heart felt Christ inspired methods. That is my translation of what it is not anything that the pastor specifically said. At the beginning of the sermon the pastor showed the movie clip of the birds that I think was before cars. You know the one where the big blue bird wants to sit with the little bird on the telephone wires and the little ones don't let him and they end up flying in the air and loosing their feathers. Yea It was funny, I felt a little weird having a video clip shown in big church. the pastor also had a mac on stage with him. Guess he is a firm believer in saving the trees. totally just kidding. but that was different for me. Their baptism was really different. I realized I don't know what the biblical guidelines are for baptism. Like who is suppose to and who can't. I know it is suppose to be someone ordained but besides that I don't know much else about it. Well it was the cutest baptism I've ever seen. The father and grandmother of this little girl maybe 7 or 6 baptized her. They both told stories about the little girl and how they saw the lord working in her and what type of spirit she had. It was soo cute brought tears to my eyes. And then the little girl gave her statement of faith....IT WAS SO CUTE! so Cute to hear her little voice saying
"I accept Jesus as my savior, and need him to forgive me of my sins, and I want to live my life from here on out for him". It was too cute! And then the grandmother baptized her which is where I began to wonder if women baptizing was biblical or if them not was biblical. I don't really know. I will need to call my daddy and ask him. And look it up on my own! But the church was really good. I miss invitations though. I realized today I haven't been in a church that offers one. Katherine said it's cause I haven't been to a baptist church yet. I've never been to a service before I came here where there wasn't one. It's weird. I always remember pastor Rogers and Bro Steve saying no matter what they always gave an invitation and I just thought that was normal...I guess not. But I like it being normal and think it should be a normal thing.

While at church today I realized my deep desire to do something with kids. Preferable underprivileged kids. For example I desperately want to work either at a inner city school or work at an orphanage over seas. I never really thought of myself as a person who loved kids but I really am! It never ceases to amaze me how much just a random kid can brighten my day! Seriously they can change my attitude a complete 180 just by a simple smile. I was reminded of that at the football game the other day. I'm not sure why God has placed these desires in my heart but I know they can't and won't be ignored. They are someway somehow going to be played out in my life. I can't see the big picture yet but there are some kids out there that already have half of my heart in their hands and I can't wait to hold half of their hearts in mine. To give them back whatever it may be that they couldn't find in another. To show them the love of God! ahhh im getting all emotional now and I have no idea where my life is even going to be in the next year, hey even in the next week! But somewhere I know theres a little boy or girl who I am going to be able to touch and hold and with the help and power of God heal. Maybe it will just be in little simple ways like helping them solve problems after school, or giving them a ride home, or playing catch whatever the simple act may be I pray that I listen and follow the will of God that will lead me to that place. That I will not ignore the chances I have everyday here on campus and in my knoxville community. May I not become comfortable, lazy, or focus my attention on myself. May I realize the gifts I have been given and see the life that I was created to live. I want my kids now but I know God has a plan and I must be happy and satisfied with where He has placed me at this time. I must look around and be still and listen to who, what , and where He is showing me in the here and now. Ill make it to my little kids, or village one day but until that day I'm going to try and grasp all the treasure I'm suppose to share and unfold here today, in this moment.
For not one of knows the moments we are given.
Sorry that gets really deep and weird and....yea.....my thoughts lol.

If many of you don't know Since i was like 6 I've wanted to do missions. My grandma use to tuck me and my little sister, lizzie, into bed and ask us what we wanted to be when we grew up. I think I always answered a missionary or a mommy. Those are the desires of my heart. I don't know where God will lead me. I use to want to go to China, then it was a jungle, now its a school or an orphanage. Whatever it is I'm willing to go. All I want is to be completely empty before Christ. For then will I know that I am out of my comfort zone and I am doing nothing for myself but only for His Glory and for the advancement of His kingdom. That is the reason for the longest time that I wanted to go to a jungle. For there I knew it couldn't be about me. I wouldn't be there trying to impress people or worried what society thought of me. It was there that I would know I had laid it all down at Christ's feet. Today I have realized I don't have to go to a jungle to find that. That even in a jungle I could be doing it for my own glory. I realize that it is a constant battle to lay down my old flesh and put on the new skins that are in Christ. I also realize he will teach me to do that wherever I am not just in a jungle. Those are the crazy thoughts of abby. The thoughts that pretty much make up who I am and what I want to do with my life. I don't know where I am to go or what I am to do. All I know is that I want to live my life completely for someone else. I want to do something significantly substantial for someone else. I want to be doing something for others.  Not sure if this made sense but there it is!! Tada!

And my paper is still frozen...Maybe it is just a sign that I should give up. Well I'm going to seek technological assistant! So long for a short while my friends!